Although our society is moving towards progress in gender equality in our everyday lives, we cannot deny that we still live in a patriarchal society where hypermasculinity, misogyny, and manipulation continue to exist and shape our behaviors. According to the Oxford Dictionary, “hypermasculinity” describes the exaggeration of masculine stereotypes such as aggression, dominance, strength, and physical prowess. These stereotypes, which include the pressure for men to appear “buff” and “strong” while attracting more romantic partners, perpetuate toxic masculine dominance and competition. When “hypermasculinity” governs a man’s mind, I believe it may influence them to make decisions and enter a state where they feel they need to assert their dominance, strength, and “betterness” to others, which in my opinion could lead to misogyny.
With this “dominance” driven mindset, men may objectify women through “harmless sexist jokes” and even through unspoken rules such as the “bro code.” I believe that the so-called bro code breeds misogyny. Bro code is also known as “unspoken rules for the bros.” It is a social construct that was made for “bros” to follow. For example, dating a bro’s ex is considered off limits, like “bros before women,” and if his girl asks, don’t snitch on him no matter what, even if their behavior is bad. I see these rules as a kind of patriarchy because they are meant to enhance men’s status and superiority over girls and dismiss the needs of women. An argument can be made that “bro code” emphasizes the idea that “because I had a history with you, now none of my friends can get with you because you are “my territory”. This idea objectifies women.
I believe that banning people from dating other people because your friend dated them isn’t being considerate of those people’s feelings. With more maturity, a person could see that friendships can be maintained and don’t make them off limits to all the other people you know. Many people meet their partners through their friends. It’s irrational to fall out with a friend or relative simply because they met someone they liked enough to pursue a relationship with and you happened to know the person. It could also be seen as controlling. Enforcing that someone that you know is off limits and harassing them without even knowing the full story is just a form of insecurity disguised as “hypermasculinity.”
It is important to keep in mind that this misogynist view could dispossess a woman’s control over her life decisions. Misogyny can present in many forms in our everyday lives. It exists to degrade and devalue women’s abilities whether it be through subtle actions, jokes, or conversations, it amplifies men’s “betterness” and control over others which is toxic. Thus, maturity and clear communication in situations like these are crucial especially when it comes to maintaining friendships, respect, and consideration towards others. It is crucial to have honest conversations, get each other’s point across, and understand each other’s point of view before jumping to conclusions and letting assumptions govern one’s actions. Misleading assumptions and not getting everything cleared up can easily burn bridges between friends and other people.